o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
only you would photoshop your dick
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
