I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
