Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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