I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
