forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
