Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
