Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
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