Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
