i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
