why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
