she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
