Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
