Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
barbara walters just said penis...
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
