dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
No I am not eating basil off your cock
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
