new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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