the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
The convent might be a nice break from real life
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize
