she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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