we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize