Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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