Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
