If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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