i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
