I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize