alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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