1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
