She's JV to your varsity
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
