I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
