i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
