She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Randomize
