You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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