Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Enjoy the penises
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
