Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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