just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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