She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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