week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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