Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
