1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize