And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
