I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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