Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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