WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
