Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize