Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
