His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
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