You made me cry and you don't even care
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
