There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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