'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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