i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
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