In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Randomize
