Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Randomize
