I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Randomize
